Monday, May 8, 2017


I was watching Z, and unlike much of the scholarship hitherto, Zelda was seen as the talented one, and Fitzgerald was obsessed with fame and immortality and feeling sorry for himself and keeping Zelda down.

My thought was, you can't really know about "immortality" and it isn't permanent. The internet has the false air of forever. We need to come to terms with the absolute forgetfulness the universe will have regarding individual humans. When the sun expands and engulfs the earth, we hopefully will be on other planets, but I also can't say that humans were really worth saving. I keep thinking about Battlestar Gallactica and the cylons saying, "they never asked if they should live on." I think humans are too short sighted and violent. Humans are also capable of great things, and if you just look at the highs, maybe they are worth preserving. I suppose we are our lows and highs and everything in between. We try to survive. Except for our collective death instinct. Trump has a death instinct when he wants to deregulate the EPA. Imagine a new car--the polluter--when driving a gas guzzler is not enough, now pollute more. But I digress. There's an article I saw on line, are we depressed or are we reacting to depressing events in our times? That is the eternal question.

I don't think people are one thing, they are many things, have both sides. Schopenhauer hoped to be remembered in the history of philosophy. He is that father of pessimism, but he hoped in various ways, no matter how much he was disappointed by life. He fed into it with his behavior, I think.

I'm reading The Love Artist by Jane Alison. Alison makes Ovid obsessed with fame. I guess it's possible for people to be motivated by that, it's just I don't think that way. Even a great teacher who impacts hundreds of lives, an author with a huge following, in 200 years, it is unlikely anyone knows their name. And if say you hit the literary cannon jackpot and your works survive on, it's only temporary. Another few millennial and the cannon is cut. And cut. When we're traveling into outer space which authors will survive. I have a feeling Carl Hiaasen won't stand the test of time, but he is quite popular and enjoyed in these times. I'd choose appreciation in my lifetime over immortality. I put all my chips in this life.

The female character in The Love Artist is interesting. Their relationship is interesting. I wonder at Alison and who she had experiences to write this novel, or if it was pure imagination. The book has gotten me into Ovid in a way I couldn't have been before. Historical novels are a good entry into the study of things. It has the over arching narrative I need, as a whole to the parts learner.

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